Page 5 of 33

Posted: Sun Dec 13, 2009 9:35 am
by LactoseTolerant
The back engine is blocky. Very blocky, and shielded by the mecha sprite.

The two circular weapon mounts at the mid of the ship take away any sense of depth when I approached it. So does the one at the rear :? .

The angled exterior panels don't fit... the trapezoidal shape makes it feel jagged/incomplete.

Other than that, it's pretty solid.

Posted: Mon Dec 14, 2009 4:14 am
by Kiltric
jwa, bearing in mind your desire to keep it fairly similar, I think it would help to remove the forward-most engine section, as well as get rid of the long, flat sections in the very rear so that "square", so to speak, is gone.
In any case, good luck.

edit: just noticed, not sure if you know, but there appears to be a mirroring error as well. Just behind the middle bright blue light and out a little bit. There's a black-ish section on one side and not the other.

Kiltric wrote:It's just an idea.
Anna wrote:Okay... Jesus Christ.
How about adding something constructive too?

edit again: Fair enough Anna. I concede that it was ridiculous and stupid.

However, jwa, the reason for my suggestion was mainly to allow for a different engine layout, so what do you think of something resembling the following?
Image

It would allow for more options but generally maintain the Star Destroyer shape.
Also, I outlined the mirroring error I saw.

Posted: Mon Dec 14, 2009 4:16 am
by Anna
Kiltric wrote:How about adding something constructive too?
How about shutting the fuck up you worthless sack of noob?

Edit: Okay, that was harsh, sorry. But frankly, my commentary was as constructive as I felt like getting, because Jwa's style of shipbuilding clashes terribly with my own, so any suggestions I make are liable to not work. However, your "idea" was, frankly, ridiculous looking.

Posted: Mon Dec 14, 2009 11:22 am
by jwa8402
Trying something different.
Image

Posted: Mon Dec 14, 2009 11:49 am
by Exethalion
Something in this design certainly shizzles my nizzle. Nice work, I like the blue gradient in the mouth thing.

Posted: Wed Dec 16, 2009 8:27 am
by jwa8402
Ok really only worked on this last night and this morning. I'm happy with parts of it but when I zoom out to look at the whole thing its kinda cluttered and blocky. Not nearly finished with the engines and outer armor, etc, but this is maybe 75% done. Any feedback? Don't care if its critical.

Image

Posted: Wed Dec 16, 2009 8:38 am
by Anna
Remember the advice I gave you once about right angles and avoiding them if at all possible? You seem to have forgotten it, so I thought I'd just repeat it. Those rear engines would probably look quite good if you hadn't added the bits that make them look like big grey lego blocks, man. Another problem I'm seeing here is something else I've warned you against: Using flat, boring BIG sections to fill internals. Smaller sections are almost always better. I'm gonna throw up a picture highlighting the bits I think are well done, and the bits I think you could definitely do without.

Image
Legend:
Red = Bits that definitely need removal and replacement.
Blue = Outlines the strongest, most interesting looking and well made parts of the ship.
Green = Suggestions to make the ship more interesting to look at, and to help remove excessive right angles and long, flat edges.

Posted: Wed Dec 16, 2009 8:50 am
by jwa8402
Hmm ok thank you, I think I can accommodate pretty much all of that. As I said I really haven't gotten to the outer armor or shape yet so it will definitely be rounded out but good to know the trouble spots.

I got a question about the engines though. What I was trying to do with those squarish parts but give it a base, like the ship extends below that and the engines are mounted on top. So would I be better off eliminating that and shaping exterior armor around the engines? Or making those 'background' sections really dark, so its more obvious the engines are separate and on top? Not sure if I'm being clear, but regardless now I know where to start, thank you.

Posted: Wed Dec 16, 2009 8:55 am
by Anna
jwa8402 wrote:I got a question about the engines though. What I was trying to do with those squarish parts but give it a base, like the ship extends below that and the engines are mounted on top. So would I be better off eliminating that and shaping exterior armor around the engines? Or making those 'background' sections really dark, so its more obvious the engines are separate and on top? Not sure if I'm being clear, but regardless now I know where to start, thank you.
Well, if you want to have "background" sections behind the engines, give them interesting details or something. Give it a reason to be there. Otherwise, scrap it and maybe add some armour plating to those engines, because the engines are beautiful and you don't want an ugly-ass background/base ruining them.

Posted: Wed Dec 16, 2009 3:01 pm
by jwa8402
Ok so I tried to fix some of those big problem areas, not sure if I made them too cluttered instead... The engines are pretty much as I was envisioning them, though I'm split about whether to add any more armor plates over them. Some of the structure may change as I try to lower the section count since its over 200. Once I get that lower, I'll be able to do something about those right angles. Also have to go back and reshade everything, or at least add glows. If I'm still going in the wrong direction with this, let me know.

Image

Posted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 5:41 pm
by jwa8402
More nonsensical changes. Still got a bit left to do, some details and I'd like to fix the sides of the nose.

Image
Finally got the hull count from almost 250 down to 190, may get it a bit lower still. Now I can start adding some of the stuff I wanted.

yes/no/eyevomit?

Posted: Sat Dec 19, 2009 9:32 am
by 25000st
The parts that look like claws are a bit cluttered and don't have flow. The depth is very well done. The rest of the ship looks pretty good. You may want to remove the windows though. Keep it up Jwa.

Posted: Sun Dec 20, 2009 12:52 am
by parameciumkid
I'm compelled to say that, while not taking any sides here, "sack of noob" is a pretty hilarious diss.
[/interjection]

Posted: Sun Dec 20, 2009 1:30 am
by god froggy
parameciumkid wrote:I'm compelled to say that, while not taking any sides here, "sack of noob" is a pretty hilarious diss.
[/interjection]
Definitley. Quite an advance from "sack of shit" or just "noob".

Posted: Sun Dec 20, 2009 5:27 am
by Kiltric
god froggy wrote:
parameciumkid wrote:I'm compelled to say that, while not taking any sides here, "sack of noob" is a pretty hilarious diss.
[/interjection]
Definitley. Quite an advance from "sack of shit" or just "noob".
Indeed it is, I laughed my ass off.
/endinterjection

jwa, yes

In my mind, any further nitpicks come down to taste rather than quality. This ship is, objectively, great. Unless there's something about it that bothers you, I'd say put it in the trophy case and start another.