If the second picture is a demonstration of your progress, then you're not doing bad at all. Some tips:
- Use shading to add depth. This would definitely improve your ship, I think. Right now it looks very messy and flat because all the sections are the same colour. Use darker shades for sections that are lower, and lighter shades for sections that are higher. This will also prevent your weapons from being indistinguishable from the hull itself.
- Add some colours. Not bright, obnoxious colours, though. On grey ships like this, it's best to use faded-looking sections for colour. Brightly coloured doodads can work well too, however.